MANAGING UNCERTAINTY AND DISAPPOINTMENT
In the wake of COVID-19, many of us are facing uncertainty and disappointment. The good news is that there are researchsupported best practices for managing uncertainty (expectations in general) and disappointment (when expectations are not met). To tackle both issues, here鈥檚 a simple, four-point checklist.
1. REVISE YOUR EXPECTATIONS. The first thing to ask yourself when facing uncertainty or disappointment is: What am I expecting/what did I expect? The fact is, you need to be ready for a variety of potential outcomes.
To revise your expectations:
- Think back on history. What are some examples that apply to the current situation? What led to one situation going differently from another?
- Set up reasonable expectations. When facing a new situation, be prepared for the good, the bad and the neutral. When imagining a 鈥渂ad鈥 outcome, focus on realistic consequences鈥攏ot some end-of-the-world scenario鈥攁nd how you could move forward in that situation.
2. INCREASE YOUR TOLERANCE. In the context of COVID-19-induced isolation, a lot of people feel like their 鈥渆nergy to deal with stuff鈥 cup is running on empty. We need to learn how to refill that cup and how to make it bigger鈥攕o it takes longer to drain.
To increase your tolerance:
- Practice mindfulness meditation. Try the Koru Meditation classes offered by KSU or any meditation app.
- Sleep regularly and long enough.
- Drink enough water and eat regular, healthy meals.
- Don鈥檛 immediately distract yourself when you experience a negative emotion. Take at least 5 minutes to process what happened and how you鈥檙e feeling before running away from it.
3. REEVALUATE PERCEPTIONS AND BEHAVIOR. Don鈥檛 miss the learning opportunities that negative situations offer. You can still be upset鈥攂ut after you鈥檝e felt those feelings, come back to the situation. Reframe and reevaluate what to do now. You鈥檒l feel better with a reasonable, specific plan of action. Don鈥檛 set nebulous goals like 鈥済et better at drawing鈥濃攊nstead, plan to practice sketching for 10 minutes a day after you eat dinner.
To practice reevaluating perceptions and behavior:
- Think back on disappointments you鈥檝e experienced that panned out okay. Practice reframing your perceptions and make a retroactive (or current) plan of action for how you could improve.
- Talk through these experiences with your friends, following the above steps.
- Come back to disappointing/uncertain situations after taking a break (see below).
4. TAKE A BREAK. Sometimes you just need to step away from a situation to clear your head. Make sure you come back to the situation鈥攍eaving it unattended to will only make it worse in the end鈥攂ut it鈥檚 okay to refill your cup and try again later.
While you probably know your favorite way to take a break, here are a few recommendations:
- Take a hot shower.
- Chat with a friend/loved one.
- Go for a walk (outside if you can).
- Try some simple stretches.
- Drink some water and take a nap.
Try enacting just one of these strategies today鈥攜our future self will thank you for it!
鈥斅槎褂霸 State of Wellness Ambassadors: Samantha Nousak, MA 鈥20, doctoral candidate in sociology, and Muhammad Hassan Bin Afzal, doctoral candidate in political science.